Joey Valence & Brae Deliver an Indescribable Performance at Chicago's Subterranean

Writing these concert reviews is never an easy thing.

Maybe it's just me, but it almost feels like being set up to fail. Here I am, someone that most of you don't know, and I'm supposed to take one of the ultimate "you had to be there" experiences that exists and describe what it was like to you after the fact? And you weren't there too? It's like telling someone about an amazing meal, only the meal might not be available in your city again for another few years.

That's not to say you can't get something out of powering your way through the things I post on this site (please don't leave!). It's just that, by their very nature, any concert is going to be a challenge to describe.

And then you get a show like the one Joey Valence and Brae put on at Chicago's Subterranean last night that make the job go from 'tough nut to crack' to 'oh fuck all this' levels of frustrating. The kind of show that you spam dozens of pics and videos to your group chat of. The kind of show that you'll go on and on about to your significant other every time you wear the t-shirt you bought that night. And even if they are a saint, even if they're truly paying rapt attention to every painstaking detail, you're never going to do it. You're never going to truly convey to them just how electric the night was. The sensation of the floor shaking beneath the crowd's feet every time they jumped. How fans absolutely jam packed themselves into the narrow venue, the heat and condensation fogging up the room without the need for dry ice.

Every once in a while, a show comes along that blows you away to a level where you just can't describe it. A true "you had to be there" event. You'll never be able to do justice to the evening with mere words. But it won't stop you from trying.

And it won't stop me from trying right now! Words may not be able to do the evening justice, but that's why I'm here with both words and pictures!

Kicking off the evening was Australian rapper Sloe Jack, a master of autobiographical lyrics delivered with impeccable flow. Using his time between songs to really engage with the audience and open up about himself, Sloe Jack (real name Jack Mark Garritty) leaned heavily on self-depreciation and the energy of youth, revealing a story of a teenager using music creation as a literal and figurative escape from a home life filled with abuse in an area of Australia ravaged by meth use.

Garrity seems to be making the most of the opportunity he's given himself, pouring everything he has into both his music and his performance.

Yes, I realize how idiotic it seems using the first chunk of this review telling you how impossible a task it is to put into words what this concert was like to experience, only to try and do just that right now. But the good news is that I've come with somewhat of a solution. If you really want to get a taste of what a Joey Valence and Brae performance is like to witness, follow this step-by-step guide:

• Invite enough people over that it's a struggle to lift your arms in the air
• Put on their new album Punk Tactics
• Turn the volume up as loud as your speakers will tolerate
• Turn them up juuuust a bit more than that
• Jump up and down the entire time music is playing
• Do this for about an hour and a half or until you pass out

If that sounds exactly like a house party, you're starting to get the idea. Strangers packed shoulder to shoulder, body to body, in a way that might feel awkward and potentially inappropriate in any other setting. That semi-claustrophobic-but-still-somehow-fun feeling was only intensified once Joey Valence and Brae hit the stage. Jumping and singing every single word right back to them, the crowd was at a 10/10 in energy from the get-go, and somehow Valence and Brae seemed determined to outdo the mob before them. Despite the rapidly-increasing temperatures in the room causing everyone both onstage and off to sweat their asses off. you never would have guessed from the movement and energy given off by Valence as he bounced around the stage like a man possessed, never missing an opportunity to accentuate his performance with a knowing grin or a spastic jump (and sometimes both at once). It sometimes seemed like there wasn't much at all stopping Valence from jumping offstage and performing the entire set from the center of the crowd, smashing his body into the mosh pit of his own creation during songs like 'STARTAFIGHT' and 'DELINQUENT (TEEN TITAN)'.

While no slouch in the energy department himself, Brae proves himself to be the perfect counterpoint to the cartoon-character fury that Valence brings to the stage. While Valence may come across as a vodka Red Bull you slam during a pregame to get the night started, Brae's laid back and surprisingly technical delivery on songs like 'TANAKA 2' hits like the Hennessy you sip on later in the evening to keep your momentum going. Now from here my drink metaphor falls apart because mixing both of those things together would be absolutely disgusting, but mixing Valence and Brae is a match made in auditory heaven.

Comparing the show to the feel and energy of a house party wasn't just a lazy comparison that sounded cool. It had the honest to goodness feel of a classic house party. The feel of having what might be too many people in an enclosed space. The sensation of danger as the walls and ceiling move with the crowd. Mosh pits. The floor clearing out and making space for a worm-dance contest. A dude coming up onstage to perform a flying backflip stumble that sent his phone flying in the opposite direction of his body. Underage attendees with a giant black X marked on the back of their hands. Even the fact that the show was happening on a Monday night gave the whole evening the air of irresponsibility, but in a good way.

Tying the entire evening together was the connection between Valence and Brae. There are some things that just can't be faked, and the amount of fun that both these guys have performing with each other is one of those things. Parts of their songs or performance might come off as goofy or a little too over the top if it wasn't for the fact that Valence and Brae have that sort of best-friend energy where there is no shame, no judgement. Where you can fully cut loose and be the goofiest version of yourself. And that feeling spilled out into the audience too, with several fans in the front row memeing out and recording chunks of the show on a Nintendo DS and early 2000's flip phone.

Would I say that this show was 'life changing'? By that definition, probably not. It's hard to describe something as low stakes and low stress as a live music performance and say that it had a true and lasting impact on the way you live the rest of your days moving forward. But there's a difference between a show changing your life and a show being an experience that you remember for the rest of your life. And when it comes to the absolute throwdown that Joey Valence and Brae delivered to the people of the Windy City, it's definitely one for the ages that can easily slot in to that second category.

Fortunately for the people of the United States, the Punk Tactics tour continues through February so the Greatest House Party On Tour can be seen with your own eyes.

Like I said...you had to be there. So be there.

Joey Valence & Brae Setlist - Subterranean, Chicago 1.29.24

WATCH YO STEP
TANAKA 2
DANCE NOW
STARTAFIGHT
HOOLIGANG
RN
KILL BILL
INTERMISSION
Crank It Up
CAN’T STOP NOW
Double Jump
DROP!!
DELINQUENT (TEEN TITAN)
GUMDROP
CLUB SANDWICH
PUNK TACTICS
Everytime We Touch